In the book "Islamic Manners", Shaykh 'Abd al-Fattah Abu Ghuddah mentions the following key points directed towards the sisters predominantly. That is not to say that brothers are innocent of that which is mentioned but just to say that it is ooften the women who partake in such things.
1. Timing your visit: If you want to visit your relatives or your Muslims sisters, be careful when selecting the days and the hour of your visit and its duration. Do not arrive for example at meal times or at resting times as this may cause inconvenience to the host. Even with relatives and friends make your visit short, brief and pleasant. Avoid turning your visit into a boring wearisome, inquisitive and lengthy visit.
2. Purpose of your visit: The purpose of your visit should be to rekindle and nourish friendship or kinship. A brief considerate visit is more beloved that the long tedious one in which the conversation moves from being purposeful to being aimless and trivial.
3. Conversation:
The tabi'i Muhammad ibn Shihab al Zuhri said:
"When a meeting becomes too long, Satan increasingly participates in it."
As the length of a visit increases and shaytaan increasingly participates, the conversation turns from that which is beneficial to tale bearing, gossip, backbiting and other undesirable and unislamic traits. The worst of all people on the day of judgement will be the one who is 2 faced. So be careful and aware of that which leaves your tongue. The sane and intelligent Muslim sister does not have time for the nonesense of idle talk, gossip and backbiting, speak that which is of benefit or remain silent.
The evils of Al-Ghiba'a are deeply rooted in today's socieety, to read more about Al-Ghiba'a, its causes and cures CLICK HERE and HERE. May Allah purify us and distance us from the evils of the tongue. Ameen.
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