30 April 2007

Seeking Permission to Enter

Allah (سبحانه وتعالى) says in the Quran:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا تَدْخُلُوا بُيُوتًا غَيْرَ بُيُوتِكُمْ حَتَّى تَسْتَأْنِسُوا وَتُسَلِّمُوا عَلَى أَهْلِهَا ذَلِكُمْ خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَذَكَّرُونَ
"O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, untill you have asked permission".
(Quran 24: 27)
Allah (سبحانه وتعالى) also says:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لِيَسْتَأْذِنكُمُ الَّذِينَ مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ وَالَّذِينَ لَمْ يَبْلُغُوا الْحُلُمَ مِنكُمْ ثَلَاثَ مَرَّاتٍ مِن قَبْلِ صَلَاةِ الْفَجْرِ وَحِينَ تَضَعُونَ ثِيَابَكُم مِّنَ الظَّهِيرَةِ وَمِن بَعْدِ صَلَاةِ الْعِشَاء ثَلَاثُ عَوْرَاتٍ لَّكُمْ لَيْسَ عَلَيْكُمْ وَلَا عَلَيْهِمْ جُنَاحٌ بَعْدَهُنَّ طَوَّافُونَ عَلَيْكُم بَعْضُكُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ كَذَلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمُ الْآيَاتِ وَاللَّهُ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ
" O ye who believe! let those whom your right hands possess, and the
(children) among you who have not come of age ask your permission (before they come to your presence), on three occasions: before morning prayer; the while ye doff your clothes for the noonday heat; and after the late-night prayer: these are your three times of undress: outside those times it is not wrong for you or for them to move about attending to each other: Thus does Allah make clear the Signs to you: for Allah is full of knowledge and wisdom.".
(Quran 24:58)
If family members are resting in their rooms and you want to join them, or enter, it is appropriate adab to seek their permission or to knock on the door. This was recommended by the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) so as to protect us from seeing them in a condition that either you or they may dislike. This is applicable to the entire household.
The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said,
"Seeking permission [to enter another person's private space] has been made compulsory only because of eyesight (i.e. only so that people do not see that which is unlawful for them to see, such as a stranger woman)."
(Bukhari & Muslim)
'Ata Ibn Yasir (رضى الله عنه) narrated:
"A man asked the Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) 'Should I seek permission to enter my mother's room?' The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) answered 'Yes'. The man said, ' We live together in the same house'. The Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said 'Ask permission to join her'. The man argued 'But I serve her!' The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said 'Ask for permission. Would you like to see her naked?' The man replied 'No'. The prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said 'Then ask for her permission before entering'.
Similarly:
"A man asked 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud(رضى الله عنه) , "Should I ask permission to enter my mother's room?" He answered, "Yes there are certain circumstances in which you would rather not see her".
In another narration, Zaynab, the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud said that before opening the door of his house, 'Abdullah used to make a noise, lest he surprised and embarrassed his family. Likewise:
"A man asked Hudhayfa ibn al-Yaman (رضى الله عنه) , "Should I ask permission to enter my mother's room?" Hudhayfa replied, "Yes, if you do not ask for her permission, you may cause yourself a needless embarrassment".
When children reach a certain age they must ask permission and be taught to establish prayer. Allah (حانه وتعالى) says in the Quran:
وَإِذَا بَلَغَ الْأَطْفَالُ مِنكُمُ الْحُلُمَ فَلْيَسْتَأْذِنُوا كَمَا اسْتَأْذَنَ الَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِهِمْ كَذَلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ آيَاتِهِ وَاللَّهُ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ
"And when the children come of age, let them ask for permission, as do those senior to them in age; thus does Allah make clear His signs. Allah is all-knowing all wise"
(Quran 24: 59)
Musa the so of the Companion Talha ibn Ubaydullah (رضى الله عنه) said,
"My father went to my mothers room. I followed him as he entered. He turned towards me and pushed me down, forcing me to sit. Then he reprimanded me "How dare you enter without permission?"
Nafi' (رضى الله عنه) the companion of 'Abdullah ibn Umar said,
"When any of the children of Ibn Umar came of age, Ibn Umar would assign that child to another room. He would not allow any of them to enter his room without permission".
'Ata ibn Abi Rabah (رضى الله عنه) reported that he asked Ibn Abbas
"Should I seek permission when calling my two sisters?" Ibn Abbas answered "Yes". I said, "I am their gaurdian, supporter and providor of their needs". He said, " Would you rather see them naked?" Then he recited the verse of the Quran (24:59), comcluding that is is obligatory to seek permission for all.
Ibn Mas'ud (رضى الله عنه) said, "A person should seek permission whenever entering the room of a father, a mother, a brother, or a sister." Jabir also said, "A person should seek permission whenever entering the room of a son, a daughter, a mother - even if she is old, a brother, a sister, or a father."
SUMMARY:
1. Always seek permission even of those under your care.
2. Don't surprise or embarrass people so you or they dislike it.
3. Knock calmly to seek permission
4. When children come of age, (approx 7) teach them to seek permission.

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